waiting to smile

Growing up I was vibrant hopeful pretty. Unfortunately, my father was a heroin addict and we lived pretty much in poverty.

We grew up in the Varrio. My sister and I were bussed to the wealthier part of town for school.

We were excelled for our grade so we went to a better school. But all of the kids there had many clothes, and the basic health care like dental. My father was too busy knocking our teeth out to care about routine dental visits.

Later in life after graduating I got a job to cover my dental except I was then diagnosed with lupus. Now taking all the necessary medications to feel better, my teeth began to rapidly decay.

I’m only 40 and still very pretty but I am so ashamed to show any amount of joy because then it will expose my teeth.

My front teeth were decent however I married a man who after 10 years of marriage decided to do steroids and in a roid rage slammed my face into the ground cracking both of them entirely in half.

I then found myself in a domestic violence shelter, where they tried to fix my teeth as much as they could afford. However this they just temporarily filled them and now ten years later this too is cracking.

I have 5 boys and I know they would rather have a mom who can smile I’m embarrassed of my mouth and missing and decaying teeth. Not to mention the constant pain I’m in to eat or drink.

If anyone could find it in there heart to help me, then for once after a very long time I can truly show the world my joy, without shame.

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